Do We All Become Grumpy Old Men? Reflections On the Feud Between Daryl Hall And John Oates….

My mother always, in the AM days, used to keep her radio tuned to 3KZ, a station known for its golden oldies. It is no surprise that now that FM has been in the ascendency for over three decades, that 3KZ’s successor station, GOLD FM is playing constantly in her kitchen.

I’m Countdown Generation, so music from the 1980s has a special place in my heart. Hence I do not mind hearing songs from the 1980s and 1990s playing when I visit my mother most mornings.

The musical duo who insist on calling themselves Daryl Hall and John Oates rather than ‘Hall and Oates’ (which has always sounded a bit like a breakfast cereal anyway) make up a prominent part of the GOLD FM playlist. This morning I heard their 1981 hit ‘Private Eyes’ whilst sipping coffee with my mother. Frequently on weekends, their 1984 hit (probably their last really big song) ‘Out of touch, out of time’ replays every few hours.

These songs, aside from being in GOLD FM’s current playlist, are part of my teenage years, as are a lot of other songs by this dynamic musical duo who were so present in the 1980s.

Which is what makes their current legal feud over ruptures in their musical partnership so sad. Those two musicians were once like brothers, with a 55 year long friendship.

Look at the music video for their early hit ‘You make my dreams come true’. As they mime along to the lyrics, you would be blind not to see the sheer joy that radiates from their faces at having this chance to strike it big in the music world.

Or look a few years before that, when in 1973 they made an intentionally bizarre music video (featuring the devil and penguin flippers, amongst other things) for early single ‘She’s Gone’. They got a TV station so mad that they were threatened with being blacklisted from Philadelphia radio. Such reckless mischief making could only be the product of a strong and vibrant friendship.

But now they are suing each other. Their friendship is over. The only solace I have in that is that the last song they made which I or the general public noticed was ‘So Close’ from circa 1990. They have long since stopped making beautiful music together, and now they no longer make beautiful money together either.

Which leaves me wondering. Do we all become grumpy old men where the residuals of money making take precedence over a lifelong friendship? As I head north out of my mid 50s, I sure hope not.