Collingwood get eliminated from the AFL finals – most of Australia has something finally to smile about

Ok… my team got eliminated in week one of the AFL finals, but after the 2016 premiership miracle, I am not too put out.

One thing that always gives most Australians something to smile about is the suffering of Collingwood supporters. As a kid in the late 1970s and early 1980s, when Collingwood kept making grand finals and kept on losing them (North Melbourne in 1977, Carlton in 1979 and 1981, Richmond in 1980), it was the kind of thing that gave me great cause for amusement (that same period was not a time where the on-field performance of the Footscray Football Club gave much cause for joy).

There are always heaps of Collingwood jokes going round. In 1981, when Buck Rogers in the 25th Century was on TV, one of the jokes was:

Q: What did Buck Rogers say when he woke up after 500 years?

A: Has Collingwood won a premiership yet?

Most jokes about Collingwood are far more mean spirited than that, and I am guilty of telling heaps of those.

Biggest Collingwood joke today is a sight gag last night during the Geelong-Collingwood semi-final, where the Channel 7 cameras kept on constantly crossing to a view of Eddie McGuire looking miserable whilst his team was slaughtered by the Cats. You see, just about everyone who does not barrack for Collingwood finds their President For Life and cashed up uber-bogan footy commentator hugely annoying. Indeed, whenever I would see him on Channel 9 (back in the days when I actually was still watching free to air TV), I would change the channel. Schadenfreude and being a non-Collingwood AFL supporter go hand in hand.

Published by Ernest Zanatta

Narrow minded Italian Catholic Conservative Peasant from Footscray.

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